From
my heart......Through out my years I have finally learned something and
come to accept some present realities. I may be shortcoming in this
light. I may even be wrong, i don't mean to be or to fall short on this
matter. But God knows how I press to love Him more, to love us, to love me, and to
understand Him and us in living and in life In Christ.
......Maybe we should never over expect people (us believers) to be PERFECT or without trials, withstandings, flaws, or hurts including ourselves. Everyone of us who are honest, as we look in the mirror of our hearts WE KNOW we wrestle with so many things, things that are even a part of us, things about ourselves, and with things a part of us and in us especially in our present flesh. We wrestle or even war with things about ourselves, things we deny to be though they truly are. Our present flesh itself has its own self serving desire and sinful will contrary to the Lords and often times the volume of our present fleshes voice is louder in our hearing than we in our hearts want it to be.
.......For instance. You feel called to fast and the voice of the flesh says Pizza and Burritos and Fried Chicken louder than ever before. Your out in public and the voice of your flesh says its time to shine and show it off when you know, if you let that animal out of the cage YOUR GOING TO FIND THE WHIP OF THE LORD shortly thereafter but somehow that old sinful flesh hisses and hisses as subtle and convincing as the serpent and its voice talks you into compromise, men and women the like. It says wear this and talk and gossip about that. You end up doing things, wearing things, inclining your ears to things, and speaking about things you know Jesus could not, would not condone or fellowship with. He never gossips. He is an intercessor. A prayer warrior. A savior, not a stone thrower and He is holy. Never tempting no one to compromise or to sin. But the mind of our generation is wicked and clever in it's sin acts and creations, and with the fellowship with darkness.
.......So often in tears, even after having divine experiences with the Lord, in visions, peculiar dreams, when even in one of those experiences I was graced to see our risen Lord in His robe of Righteousness in the doorway smiling at me, when even later on in my life one day His presence, His presence became so thick and powerful in my room I was caught away into a vision, not being able to even see my hands right in front of me and yet despite all these grace times, I have also found this out. I have found Satan to show up and harass me twice as much as before in so many trials and twice the temptations that I could write a book about it all. If the enemy is willing to come up against Jesus face to face and tempt him, we can be assured he comes to take us on as well. Hoping to throw us off Gods track for us and so many he has been successful in this wicked generation in doing so.
......This I have learned, divine visitations, dreams, visions themselves do not change hearts, nor do they exempt you from dealing with your humanity just like every one else. You have to still fight and say no and resist to sin not. Study Solomon. He to the Lord appeared to him more than once and he to saw with his own eyes the glory of the Lord in the Temple and yet shortly there after Satan came against him and Solomon sinned more than all kings in ways that heaven was astonished.
.........Sharing my heart and things I have held in for so long....please pray for me. I covet your prayers and intercessions. Sometimes I feel so much pressure. Please pray that whatever time I have left on earth that Gods will for all these things and His purpose and grace in my life comes to pass and that its fruit endures forever to the salvation of many and to the edification of the saints and to the glory of our risen Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.....thank you.....deno.
......Maybe we should never over expect people (us believers) to be PERFECT or without trials, withstandings, flaws, or hurts including ourselves. Everyone of us who are honest, as we look in the mirror of our hearts WE KNOW we wrestle with so many things, things that are even a part of us, things about ourselves, and with things a part of us and in us especially in our present flesh. We wrestle or even war with things about ourselves, things we deny to be though they truly are. Our present flesh itself has its own self serving desire and sinful will contrary to the Lords and often times the volume of our present fleshes voice is louder in our hearing than we in our hearts want it to be.
.......For instance. You feel called to fast and the voice of the flesh says Pizza and Burritos and Fried Chicken louder than ever before. Your out in public and the voice of your flesh says its time to shine and show it off when you know, if you let that animal out of the cage YOUR GOING TO FIND THE WHIP OF THE LORD shortly thereafter but somehow that old sinful flesh hisses and hisses as subtle and convincing as the serpent and its voice talks you into compromise, men and women the like. It says wear this and talk and gossip about that. You end up doing things, wearing things, inclining your ears to things, and speaking about things you know Jesus could not, would not condone or fellowship with. He never gossips. He is an intercessor. A prayer warrior. A savior, not a stone thrower and He is holy. Never tempting no one to compromise or to sin. But the mind of our generation is wicked and clever in it's sin acts and creations, and with the fellowship with darkness.
.......So often in tears, even after having divine experiences with the Lord, in visions, peculiar dreams, when even in one of those experiences I was graced to see our risen Lord in His robe of Righteousness in the doorway smiling at me, when even later on in my life one day His presence, His presence became so thick and powerful in my room I was caught away into a vision, not being able to even see my hands right in front of me and yet despite all these grace times, I have also found this out. I have found Satan to show up and harass me twice as much as before in so many trials and twice the temptations that I could write a book about it all. If the enemy is willing to come up against Jesus face to face and tempt him, we can be assured he comes to take us on as well. Hoping to throw us off Gods track for us and so many he has been successful in this wicked generation in doing so.
......This I have learned, divine visitations, dreams, visions themselves do not change hearts, nor do they exempt you from dealing with your humanity just like every one else. You have to still fight and say no and resist to sin not. Study Solomon. He to the Lord appeared to him more than once and he to saw with his own eyes the glory of the Lord in the Temple and yet shortly there after Satan came against him and Solomon sinned more than all kings in ways that heaven was astonished.
.........Sharing my heart and things I have held in for so long....please pray for me. I covet your prayers and intercessions. Sometimes I feel so much pressure. Please pray that whatever time I have left on earth that Gods will for all these things and His purpose and grace in my life comes to pass and that its fruit endures forever to the salvation of many and to the edification of the saints and to the glory of our risen Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.....thank you.....deno.
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